72 Results in anxiety

When are expectations of people damaging?

One of the greatest challenges I experience with my relationships is the other person not adapting the way they interact or work with me despite me telling them that I have ASD. It's incredibly frustrating and disheartening having to deal with people who aren't flexible, but it happens to me so frequently that I am used to it.

Controlling what you can and managing what you can’t

One very important lesson I have learned which helps in many areas of my life is: controlling what can be controlled and executing strategies to manage what can't be controlled. A strategy I use to deal with such situations is to work out what, right now in that situation in that moment, can be controlled to my benefit.

The 3 factors needed to succeed in any situation

There are three very important factors that impact on whether or not I will have a positive and successful engagement. These factors are relevant to any and every engagement - work, hobbies, friends, dating, meetings, etc. It might be very helpful for you to recognise what these three things are. You might find you can incorporate something into a situation that you're already finding very hard and find that it becomes much easier; or you might find it explains why you struggle with one thing yet excel at something else...

Getting into and staying inside your comfort zone

My last blog article about comfort zones still left me thinking a lot! I started to wonder how easy it is to make something fall within your comfort zone. I mentioned that none of the jobs I've had have ever been a part of my comfort zone. If they had been, I think I would've stayed working at those jobs for a lot longer. All of this has inspired this blog article... If you have been following my work for a while you have probably worked out that I learn a lot from graphs. I think I am a very graphic learner. They suit my way of thinking. So have a look at these graphs I have drawn:

Is it good to get outside your comfort zone?

There is some thinking that getting out of your comfort zone has lots of benefits. First, what exactly do we mean by 'comfort zone'? It generally means the activities we do that make us feel safe and comfortable, as opposed to activities that make us feel anxious and stressed. I think maybe when we think about comfort zones for autistic people or people with disabilities, they need to be thought about a bit differently. For example, I'm not sure getting out of my own comfort zone is always a good idea. In fact, I'd say that most of the time for me now, it's a bad idea. Defining your comfort zone I personally have a small number of situations that are inside my comfort zone. My house is obviously my comfort zone. My local area is my comfort zone. The way I choose to commute, by my bike, is my comfort zone. The places that I most frequently visit are my comfort zones. My routine is definitely my comfort zone. My hobbies and the way I do them are my comfort zone. My family is inside my comfort zone. My friends are inside my comfort zone (but only in certain contexts, see later). My places of work are probably just outside the edge of my comfort zone.

What is my personality and what is my autism?

I was once asked by someone, "How do I know if my behaviour is because I'm ASD or is it merely who I am?" It was a good question and one that I have many times pondered over myself. There's not a clear or easy answer.

Autism and strange diets

People with ASD may have strange diets and atypical attitudes towards eating. A serious complication of this can be a person having an eating disorder illness. Sometimes though, these habits are just normal and make sense if you remember that the person has ASD. Here is some insight into strange diets, problematic consequences and potential strategies to these. I'll also note some of the possible positives of atypical eating habits.

What can we learn from dogs about sensory overstimulation?

I have learned a lot about sensory overstimulation from learning about my dog. I think that we can learn about ASD from dogs.

The freeze response to anxiety in ASD

I've been thinking about the Freeze response to anxiety. A lot of people know a bit about Fight and Flight and less people think to remember Freeze. Let's consider Freeze and how and why it might happen to people with ASD.

How to stop saying things you don’t mean

Saying things we don't mean is a part of masking. 'Masking' is what lots of autistic people (especially females) do in social situations. Arguably the worst consequence of masking - which isn't always talked about - is that it has the potential to destroy relationships. If you are not being your true self when around others, then how can you expect to have meaningful relationships? Let's look at some ways we can learn to stop saying things we don't mean.