72 Results in anxiety

Do you control life or does life control you? The Locus

The question of whether or not you can control your life, or how much degree of control you have, is very interesting. Some people think that no matter what they do, that their fate has already largely been determined. Others believe that they can change or direct their future. You could think of these beliefs as two extremes 1) that outside factors influence what happens to an individual, and 2) that an individual can influence the outcome for themselves. I discovered that this idea is well documented in psychology and is known as the Locus of Control. Understanding of the concept was developed by Julian B. Rotter in 1954. I thought I'd write about it:

Why advance notice is important

Like most autistic people, I really struggle coping with situations that happen spontaneously. I started to think what the fundamental reason for this is and found that I have been able to summarise it quite simply... When something is going to happen, there are 3 things I need to consider:

To care or not care what others think?

Lots of people care greatly about what others think of them. Most of us from a young age are pressurised to behave and look a certain way and to follow social rules. At school, children who don't meet this strict social 'criteria', tend to be bullied. Adults may be judged negatively or suffer discrimination. Since autistic people tend to be different from most people, I wondered whether they would tend to worry about how other people perceive them.

The 2 most debilitating aspects of social anxiety

Social anxiety is an extremely restrictive condition to live with. Social anxiety, for me, is feeling extremely shy, frightened, awkward, nervous, at both the thought of interacting with someone and during the actual interaction with them. I have narrowed down the 2 most debilitating aspects, for me, of social anxiety to be...

10 ways in which autistic people mask

Masking is the term used to describe the way autistic people behave in order to hide their challenges. I was about to say "hide their 'social deficits''' but I think masking can also mean hiding other aspects of autism as well, such as sensory processing. Here is a list of masking behaviours autistic people might have:

How to cope with unpredictability

Most autistic people benefit from feeling that their world is predictable. By predictable I mean: knowing what is going to happen next and fully understanding what any situation entails. Due to the nature of being human and daily living however, no matter what measures people take, there is still going to be a degree of everyday unpredictability. I will look at some of these unpredictabilities and suggest strategies on how to manage:

What does having no instincts mean?

One of the most severe difficulties associated with autism is the difficulty imagining what might happen in a situation. You could describe this as social imagination or just simply lacking instinct. Most neurotypical people will go into any situation and be able to cope with it on the spot. The situation can be anything, for example going on the train, going to a cafe, meeting friends, going to the GP or going to a conference. In most instances they don't have to do much 'preparation' beforehand, or least not overly conscious or right-to-the-very-last-detail preparation. Autistic people, on the other hand, have a tendency to either overprepare or underprepare.

If I didn’t mask, I wouldn’t speak

I don't like the idea of masking because no one should have to hide who they really are. Individuality should be loved and accepted. But masking is also a means of being able to interact, and often, if a person did not mask, they would not be able to interact at all.

How reactive are you?

Someone who is unreactive might never say or do anything at all. Someone who is very reactive might talk too much, might talk inappropriately, might stand too close to people, be too "touchy-feely", or they might attempt to 'take over' an activity being done. The former is what you probably understand to be an autistic introvert, the latter an autistic extrovert.

Performing your best performance: 5 steps

Most people want to get the best performance out of themselves. They want to do something the best they can. These situations can be anything, such as: giving a talk, hosting an event, having an interview, participating in a competition, performing something either in front of others or just for yourself. There is a method we can follow to increase the likelihood that we perform at our best for whatever situation we would like to be at our best for.