12 Results in theory of mind

Does talking help?

There is a belief that "talking helps". That has never been my experience. A lot of the time I find that talking about my feelings makes me feel worse than before. I wanted to summarise why this might be.

To care or not care what others think?

Lots of people care greatly about what others think of them. Most of us from a young age are pressurised to behave and look a certain way and to follow social rules. At school, children who don't meet this strict social 'criteria', tend to be bullied. Adults may be judged negatively or suffer discrimination. Since autistic people tend to be different from most people, I wondered whether they would tend to worry about how other people perceive them.

What does having no instincts mean?

One of the most severe difficulties associated with autism is the difficulty imagining what might happen in a situation. You could describe this as social imagination or just simply lacking instinct. Most neurotypical people will go into any situation and be able to cope with it on the spot. The situation can be anything, for example going on the train, going to a cafe, meeting friends, going to the GP or going to a conference. In most instances they don't have to do much 'preparation' beforehand, or least not overly conscious or right-to-the-very-last-detail preparation. Autistic people, on the other hand, have a tendency to either overprepare or underprepare.

What does “different not less” mean?

There is a phrase that goes around the internet that says, “Autistic people are different, not less.” I never understood what this phrase meant until I stopped and thought about it. There is actually quite a lot of deep insight behind this phrase that many people (including me!) do or did not understand. What is… Join The Curly Hair Project Community Today This article and our podcasts are available only to members of our community. If you would like to continue t…

Narrow minded or narrowly focused?

People on the autistic spectrum are often described as being "narrow minded." The definition of narrow minded is not listening to other people's views, which has negative connotations such as being self-absorbed or stubborn. Autistic people can be like this... however, there is another way to think about narrow mindedness: how about considering it as being "narrowly focused" instead? And being narrowly focused has plenty of benefits...

Linear vs non-linear thinking

I have been reading about the idea of linear and non-linear thinking. Linear thinking is "ordered thinking in which one thought follows another in a straight line". This is in comparison to more non-linear thinking in which thoughts are "a bit more varied and each thought links to another in more than one way". This is my rough summary! Of course human beings and their thoughts are far more complex than this in reality. If I illustrate these two types of thinking, it might look like this:

Why I am careful about who I talk to

One way that I have learned to be less affected by my high emotional sensitivity and manage mood swings is to have a calmer, more steady life. Another way that I have learned to better cope with my emotional sensitivity and reduce mood swings is to take caution about who I talk to about myself and my life. Talking to the 'wrong' person can make me feel worse.

Another way of looking at “challenging behaviour”

Throughout my life I have found myself in trouble on numerous occasions. I think this is because other people think that my behaviour is strange, naughty or thoughtless and sometimes the things that I do come as a complete surprise to others. But when people look a bit deeper and try to understand me, my behaviour completely makes sense. I’m no longer “difficult” but someone that is very anxious and has quite severe and complex communication difficulties. The issues surrounding my behaviour usually happen because I have difficulty communicating with people and they have difficulty communicating with me. I have three excellent examples I can think of. The first is when my workplace was organising the local community fair. This is a fair where local shops each have a stand and the fair attracts many people from the community. My workplace had a stand and my colleagues had asked me whether I could help out on the stand. My immediate thought was "no!" I tried to say to my colleagues that I wasn't able to help out but somehow this communication was either lost or ignored and, as what normally happens, I ended up doing something I didn't want to do - in this case, I ended up helping out on the stand at the fair.

Social inclusion vs social acceptance

Inclusion is a very big word these days in society. We are all being motivated to include others into our daily lives and the lives we have in society, disregarding gender, race, age, illness, disability (mentally, physically or both) sexual orientation,…. However there does lie a difference between inclusion and acceptance. Social inclusion “Jeanne, 43, ASD, works at an office. There is a massive summer event coming up, organised by the general staff of the office. Everybody is excited and talking about it. There will be a BBQ first and then a dance at a big venue. Even though Jeanne is comfortable around her colleagues, the thought of going there frightens her and gives her anxiety. She tells her colleagues she will not be attending and uses the excuses that it is too far away from her home and the travel time will be too long. Her colleagues immediately offer to come pick her up and drive her back home after the party, so she won’t miss out on all the fun. Jeanne feels terribly distressed by this.”

The theory of mind impairment

It has long been thought that an impairment in theory of mind is a very classic trait of autism. This may be true. But what is also true is that impairment in theory of mind is not exclusive to those of us with autism. In fact, I go about my day to day life interacting… Join The Curly Hair Project Community Today This article and our podcasts are available only to members of our community. If you would like to continue to read this article, along with receiving access to our exclusive a…