62 Results in Parenting

Are you being bullied?

If a person is hypersensitive, it means they might react strongly to things that would not bother other people. Hypersensitivity can refer not only to physical sensations such as touch and sound, but also to emotions. People who are emotionally sensitive are prone to being upset by the words and actions of others. For people on the autistic spectrum however, there is an additional challenge which is being unable to work out the motives and perspectives of others (theory of mind).

“Why are you so quiet?”

How many of you have ever had the question asked, "Why are you so quiet?" or along those lines? My quietness was commented on throughout my entire childhood - by peers as well as teachers. Yet no one ever suspected I had ASD. People thought quietness was a negative character trait. This is really sad as it can actually be a wonderful, positive trait. I always used to think what a strange thing it was for teachers to remark on, since as far as I was concerned, school was a place where students listened and teachers taught. I never used to say anything, I just used to get on with my work quietly. Why was there a problem? I was getting high marks and meeting deadlines. Even as an adult, the few times I've been in employment, I've had colleagues and employers tell me that I'm "quiet." Well, yes I am quiet, why is it such a big deal to have a quiet personality? "Why are you so quiet?" is such an odd question to ask. I would never dream of asking somebody that. It feels really judgmental. I wonder why people feel that this is an acceptable thing to say? It just seems such a ridiculous thing to comment on. In hindsight however, I understand why a teacher would comment on it. They think something is wrong and that the person's confidence needs to be developed. But never did they suspect it was a characteristic of my ASD. Being quiet can be a part of someone's personality (like mine). There may also be more to it (as in my case, too). Here are some possible reasons why a person on the autistic spectrum might be quiet:

Loneliness: a part of being on the spectrum?

‘Ella (28, ASD) has promised her dad to go and watch his performance with the guitar school he takes classes with. The performance takes place in a theatre, and every seat is taken as the performance was sold out. Ella finds that a lot of people want to talk to her about the unique coat… Join The Curly Hair Project Community Today This article and our podcasts are available only to members of our community. If you would like to continue to read this article, along with receiv…

5 tips to improve executive function

Here are some tips that have helped me to strengthen some of my executive function skills. I use these tips together or separately. Some might be contradictory. They are all options for different sorts of task.

5 tips to help your autistic loved one after work

‘Ella, 27, ASD, works part time at the post office and lives with her mum. Her job is to sort out the letters early in the morning, and deliver the first round of newspapers. Every now and again she has to ring doorbells to deliver parcels as well. When she leaves work and gets home,… Join The Curly Hair Project Community Today This article and our podcasts are available only to members of our community. If you would like to continue to read this article, along with receiving…

How do our interests change when we involve others?

It is often advised that people on the autism spectrum will develop better social skills and enjoy socialising more if they socialise around their special interest. There's probably a lot of truth to that - for reasons including: There will be a predictable topic to talk about (the interest) There may be something else to focus on (if the interest is practical) as opposed to the 'socialising' The individual might have greater confidence as they are likely to know a lot about the topic It may also be sensible to recognise that, although social skills may improve, the enjoyment or interest in the interest may be different or may even get less if there are other people involved. Pursuing an interest in solitude is a completely different experience to pursuing an interest with others. For me, I treat them as separate things. Have you ever tried to participate in something you like, with other people? Have you tried to encourage your autistic loved one to participate in something you know they like, with other people? How did those experiences turn out? For me, many times they were more stressful than enjoyable. In this article I will discuss some reasons for this. I will use the example of weightlifting/exercise/fitness for ease of reading (since it applies to me), but you can think about how each aspect relates to your interest.

Time limits and durations

The time I've planned to do something is important, but so is the length of time that I've planned to do it for. For example, it's just as important for me to know that I'm going to walk my dog at 9am as it is to know I'm going to walk her for 60 minutes.

Sensory accommodations for food, exercise and sleep

The combination of good diet, good sleep and regular exercise can have enormous benefits for everyone. For people with ASD however, it might be more difficult to achieve these things - primarily due to social challenges and sensory processing difficulties. These three things though, can make the world of a difference to someone's physical and mental well being - so it's really important to take them seriously. Food Lots of people on the autism spectrum have unusual food preferences. Some of this may come down to the desire for sameness and predictability, for example insistence on eating exactly the same brand of item every time or feeling stressed when a brand changes its recipe or ingredients. 

4 golden rules for managing sensations

Having suffered an injury, I've had frequent hospital appointments! That's the inspiration for this blog article. For someone like me who has hypersensitivity, even 'normal' sensations can be extremely uncomfortable. Sounds such as fire alarm tests, sirens, drilling, hammering, the doorbell ringing and lorries driving past are things that can happen every day yet they don't overly bother most people. I personally hate the sounds of live music, instruments, singing and clapping as well, whereas many people enjoy those sounds. Nobody likes the smell of garbage or sewage but - again - people seem to get over them quickly. Feelings such as combing your hair or wearing certain items of clothing can be uncomfortable to some people but not overly so.

Autism – how do we communicate?

Communication is a daily need in our lives. We communicate to let people know how we feel, what we want, to share thoughts, feelings and experiences, to warn others… etc. Communication is both verbal and non verbal, meaning we communicate in spoken language as well as our body language and expressions on our face. What… Join The Curly Hair Project Community Today This article and our podcasts are available only to members of our community. If you would like to continue…