62 Results in Parenting

How to help someone who is in shutdown

In comparison to meltdowns, shutdowns are not talked about much in literature about autism. For many people on the autistic spectrum and their families however, shutdowns are a significant aspect to learn to cope with. What are shutdowns? They might be different for different people but some things to look out for might be: Becoming unresponsive Being unable to talk Being unable to think A need to be alone Appearing 'lost in one's own mind' A massive lack of physical and mental energy

Different behaviours at home vs when out

One of the most common things I hear from parents is that their child is well behaved at school but has terrible outbursts at home. Because the teachers don't see these difficult behaviours, it might cause them to disbelieve the parents or not believe there are any 'problems.' Similarly with adults, an adult may get on very well at work and appear friendly and kind to their co-workers, yet can behave very differently and be difficult at home. Professor Tony Attwood refers to this as the Jekyl and Hyde character. It has been highlighted in many sources that individuals on the autistic spectrum display significantly different behaviours in different settings. In this article I will look at some reasons why this might occur and how the people around the ASD individual could better support them.

Interoception (brain to body signals)

I've been learning about interoception recently. Interoception is the signalling and perception of our own internal bodily sensations. I think of it very simply as the brain to body connection. Some examples might be recognising when you are hungry, when you need to go to the toilet, or when you are in pain.

Person with ASD and exercise – things to consider

Exercise, for me, has been the number one treatment for managing my depression. I have found a sport that I truly enjoy and am very good at. I believe that one of the easiest most natural ways you can help yourself or your loved one to improve their mental (and physical) well being, is to move more. It doesn't have to be a sport, or even a particular exercise - indeed, you don't even have to think of whatever it is as 'exercise' - but rather just increasing the amount of physical activity you do. Here are my thoughts on the things to consider about ASD and exercise:

Making things better after a meltdown

In most cases, when an autistic person has a meltdown, they have very little control. This is especially true with children, but many adults also are not able to control their behaviour once a meltdown has been triggered. Whilst a meltdown is happening, most people will agree that there is no control. This is how the girl with the curly hair's meltdowns tend to start...

17 tips for doing chores you hate

There are always certain chores that you are going to dislike doing, it's part of being human! However, as well as "disliking", people on the autistic spectrum may struggle with executive functioning - the set of mental skills that enables people to get things done, things such as planning, initiating, following steps, etc. Here are some of my best tips for doing the things you don't like to do. I hope you find at least one of them helpful!

The importance of specific language

Words are very important. I am very specific and pedantic when I talk and I always prefer others to be too. Although other people can sometimes get frustrated or annoyed with my need to get down to the 'semantics' of what is being said, knowing the semantics is actually a good thing as it often represents a desire to connect with the other person. It's well known that people with ASD tend to take words as they are literally said and can therefore go around in a state of confusion if words are not said literally. This can make daily life very hard. For example, a person on our Facebook page commented: "My boss said 'bring me the safe.' She goes into the back office and sees me struggling to lift the safe so I can bring it to her. She says, 'I meant bring me what's inside the safe.' The safe itself was bolted to the floor." Here you can see the words the boss said were confusing and meant the person misunderstood the task. But there is another reason that words are important too...

10 ways to ease primary to secondary transition with ASD

The transition from primary to secondary school is thought to be one of the most difficult times for children on the autistic spectrum. Many girls in particular seem to cope quite well at primary school (even without an ASD diagnosis or without ASD even being suspected); and indeed it's far more common for girls to only be diagnosed at or after puberty, rather than before. There are lots of thoughts about why this is but in this article I will write to parents about some of the difficulties that may occur for children with ASD because of the primary to secondary transition and some suggestions on what can be done to make it easier. I would like to emphasise the huge importance of thinking about the move to secondary school well before the time actually comes. I sometimes talk to parents who tell me that their child is "only [age]" [and so] "it's a bit too early to think about that now" but I can assure you that it is not too early to at least be somewhat aware of the challenges that may arise. Many of the challenges can be greatly reduced by preparing early or, for some things, simply by being aware of them. Girls with ASD (in particular) are prone to suffering from mental health conditions in their teenage years. Some of these conditions, such as eating disorders, can negatively affect that person for the rest of their life. If there is the chance therefore, that we can reduce the likelihood of these conditions from arising, we should take it! Here's my advice to parents, based on personal experience of the things that would have helped me:

‘High maintenance’

This is an article describing why people with ASD (especially girls and women, as they tend to be more sensitive) may be considered and described as being 'high maintenance' by their loved ones. Personally, I am not interested in material things and my life is very simple and inexpensive. I don't go out very often, I don't really care about how I look, and my interests/needs don't require me to spend a lot of money. In this sense, I'm very low maintenance. I do of course have ASD however, which means I have "special needs", and there are lots of other things I do require. In this article, I will talk about a few of them. Not wanting things rather than wanting things Sounds, smells and tastes The chapter 'Try Feeling This!' in the book 22 Things a Woman with Asperger's Syndrome wants her Partner to Know is very interesting. Rudy Simone, the author, describes how an autistic person may not even think they are high maintenance because most of the stuff is about what they don't want.

Difficulties associated with being an introvert

Once I learned what introversion was, a lot of things made sense to me. I am an introvert. Once I began to understand what it meant, I felt a lot better about myself (before I knew about introversion and extroversion, I used to wonder why everyone else was so social and I wasn't). What is difficult however, is that 99% of the people around me are not as introverted as I am. In fact, I have not, to date, come across anyone who is as introverted as me.