“How do I deal with ASD and aggression?”
One of the hardest things to deal with, for any parent or loved one, is the expression of aggressive behaviour. Whether the person has ASD or not, aggression is never acceptable behaviour, and you should always aim to avoid it when possible.
My goal in this blog is to explain where aggressive behaviour in people or children with ASD comes from, and how you can best deal with it as a partner, friend, parent, etc. …
What is aggression and where does it come from?
People with autism may not always be able to place the emotions they feel. As I explained in one of my previous blogs, experiencing emotions for an Aspie often feels like being hit by a tsunami. You have no idea what hit you, or why, or what it is. You only have one option, that is to swim through that emotion as best as you can. You get completely soaked in the tsunami, and you almost become the tsunami itself.
Why is this important? Just as much as we can get totally overwhelmed by our environment, we can also be totally overwhelmed by our emotions. And because this causes immense stress and anxiety in us, we have to act upon it immediately so as to get it out of our system. When we’re happy, we are 200% happy and we show it. We flaps our hands, hums, make noises, anything to emphasize that happiness. When we’re angry, we are so overwhelmed by that feeling we need to act upon it immediately or it simply becomes too much for us to handle. This can result in completely erasing a person from our lives (if we’re angry with that person, by removing the trigger we also remove the emotion), but can also result in an aggressive explosion.
Many things can trigger an angry emotion, and it is not always easy to determine where it comes from. Even though, as a parent or loved one, it might be important to figure out the anger triggers, having helpful tips might be more helpful now!