67 Results in communication

Why am I so critical and how to manage it

The most common definition of to criticise is: "to express disapproval of the perceived faults or mistakes of someone or something." People on the autistic spectrum are often described by other people, as being too critical. Someone who is too critical can be a difficult sort of person to be around. I know that I have a tendency to annoy people by pointing out their mistakes all the time, and that I can ruin other people's enjoyment or experiences if we are out somewhere or doing something and all I do is find faults with the situation...

Why small talk matters and how to do it

The definition of small talk is 'polite conversation about unimportant or uncontroversial matters.' Most of us have to make a lot of it! I know that lots of autistic people dislike small talk (including me), but I think it has its benefits and I think there are a couple of tricks you can do to make it a bit easier.

To lead or to follow?

I am probably the perfect example of the classic stereotype of autism. I am very, very solitary - through choice and also because of my quite complex social difficulties. Any involvement with others generally makes me uncomfortable. This experience might be similar for neurotypical introverts so I think that neurotypical introverts will also find this article helpful. One major barrier to being this way is it makes it very hard to work with others in both leader (employer/manager/teacher) and follower (peer/classmate/colleague/team member) roles.

Unresponsiveness and lack of communication in ASD people

One of the reasons that having friends is hard for me is because I am not very communicative. My friends (before they understood my condition) would contact me but my responses would always be minimal and would not encourage further communication. For example, I might answer their question but then say nothing further. I'm sure many of you will be familiar with the following sorts of interaction:

Sensitivity and reactivity

I've been pondering about sensitivity and reactivity, wondering what their link is, or are they the same thing? What are sensitivity and reactivity like in people with ASD?

What is empathy and do ASD people have a lack of empathy?

I think there is some misunderstanding of what empathy actually is, which I will explore in this article. There are various definitions of empathy but the one that I use and how I think about it is that it's being able to share the feelings of another person. A good way to visualise what empathy is is being in a crowd watching a football match when your team scores a goal - the whole crowd cheers because everyone is feeling the same thing and reacting in the same way. There is a common view that people on the autistic spectrum do not have empathy. Lots of autistic people think they have lots of empathy. I want this article to look at these views in more detail. I hope you see things in a more educated way after reading this article. :)

How to feel more connected with the world

Lots of people on the autistic spectrum feel very lonely and isolated. I have been thinking about one way that a person might be able to feel more connected to the world. There are other things people can do, but here is something I haven't talked about much before.

How do I know if someone will want to talk to me?

I sometimes want to interact with someone but I am unsure how to. There are lots of worries that go through my mind any time I am about to initiate an interaction with someone (be it a colleague or even a friend). 'Working' interactions By 'working' interactions I mean interactions with colleagues, peers or strangers rather than friends. These interactions are most difficult when face to face in a public setting and there are lots of other things going on (for example, we're in a shop, in the office, or in a doctor's waiting room). I cannot read a person's body language to be able to tell if they are going to hear what I say, if they are even going to recognise me (if it's someone I don't know/know well), or to work out whether they are busy or not and therefore do they even have time to speak to me, or will I just be disturbing them?

How to be a team player at work

I am naturally a very, very solitary, self-motivated, intuitive person and generally I try to avoid collaborating with others on anything. A lot of other autistic people also greatly struggle working with other people and prefer to work on their own. Realistically however, when you work, you may well end up having to work with other people on occassion. I am learning to be a bit more of a team player. Here are some of my tips on how to better work with other people when it's very much out of your comfort zone and against your natural way of being. My conclusion is that you don't have to change your personality or pretend to be something you're not, but you could adjust your behaviour a little instead.

The 4 types of communicator

I've been reading a lot about communication (not specifically in regards to autism, just general communication) recently and through my research I discovered that there are considered to be 4 main types of communicator according to something called the VAK model. They are: Visual Auditory Feeling Auditory Digital Each type can be further broken down into 1) the choice of words somebody uses and 2) how they best understand information. Let's look in more detail about this.